trial and error?

the wait is killing me

::i drew a bean spout on this sketching thingy. i don't quite know the name it but i used to draw on them all the time when i was a little kid. even till now, i just love doodling on it. draw something, erase it, then start all over again. wish life was like that eh?::
so how did i fare for my 3 days trial?
it was extremely busy and exhausting.
for the 3 days, i was thrown into the mosh pit and was expected to swim/crawl/dig my way out of it.
seriously, they gave me tons of projects to complete and what made it worse was the fact that i had to pick up from where they left off.
it's tough when it comes to design because everyone designs and work different.
a simple text paragraph could be done in a couple of ways.
every time they hand me a new assignment, i would spend the first 15 minutes trying to figure where all the links, pictures, text and files are before i can make the necessary amendments.
and because the company is so establish, i'm dealing with thousands of files and it's just insane trying to find 1 particular file that i dun even know exist in the first place.
yes, simply put, it's like finding a needle in a stack of hay.

on the first day, it was pretty overwhelming.
the second day was way better.
the third day was effing crazy!!!
i had to deal with multiple projects simultaneously.
had to do the html for edms, landing pages and websites for some major big client.
a very major big international computer company i might add.
therefore, i had to make sure i do not make any single mistakes.

overall, despite the busy schedule, i did have some fun because this is all so new to me and i'm constantly learning from them.
what i like about working for them is that they don't bother you at all and let you do what is needed to be done.
everyone is expected to take their own initiative and even if there is a deadline to be met, no one is there to hurry you. they have this sense of trust that you will complete it in time.

as i have mentioned before, i do really want to work with them.
i have done my best during the 3 days trial.
i feel i have done well. (they said i was good)
i have the passion and motivation needed to excel.
i know i have what it takes to be a great designer.
i just wish they would consider me to be a part of their team.

they were supposed to get back to me last friday.
but they didn't.
then on tuesday, i received an email from the creative director.
in the email, she thanked me for the three days and informed me that there is another young lady on trial this week. they will let me know of my placement at the end of the week.

i'm disappointed....
and furious.
i dun understand why i have to be put into such a situation.
this job application... it's taking forever!!!
2 interviews and a trial... now i have to compete with a 'young lady'...
what more do they want? (my guess is 3 months probation if i get it)
this is ridiculous...
i hate the waiting!
it's been almost a month and i'm still waiting for a yes/no from them...
argh...

and just to clear things up,
i have been applying for other jobs too.
i have been sending out my resumes for the last 2 weeks...
but it's also taking them forever to get back to me.
argh...

i'm not giving up yet.
no i'm not.
but time is not on my side.
i have up to next january to get a job,
if not there'll be a high chance i might hafta fly back to singapore for good.

sigh...
i guess this "rich-spoilt-brat-who-gets-whatever-he-wants" is learning a thing or two about the harsh reality of life eh?
i do know what 'harsh life' is.
firstly, i was in the INFANTRY!!!
so i know what a 'shit life' is. i went through it for 2 and a half years.
(i have no respect for all the sissy clerks)

and yes, my parents may be loaded with cash,
but i'm not. and it's funny how people cant see the difference.
i would have gone into details as to how i survived with only $12.87 in my savings account,
but i choose not to, because i find it unnecessary, and i need no pity from anyone.

my point is, people shouldnt judge me.

i really am trying my best and not giving up.

just emotionally drained that's all...
but i'm feeling better just ranting it out...
whoever is reading this, thanks for tolerating my whining. :)

that's all for now...
XOXO
D

sun, sand and another interview

the sun is up

::took this picture while sun tanning with lipei at Bondi Beach::
the sun is up.
literally and figuratively.

after a disastrous interview last week,
i pretty much lost hope in the design studio i applied for.
i would be lying if i said i didn't feel a tad upset.
(i was devastated to be exact)
but yesterday, i received a miraculous email from the creative director!
she emailed me asking if i could drop by the studio for a second interview with the Managing Director.
i flipped, literally.
i was thrilled!
i was extremely grateful to God that he had answered my prayers and granted me a second chance.
never in this world would i ever have guessed i'd be given another chance to prove myself again.
i needed the comeback badly; i needed to redeem myself.

dressed in my finest suit, i went for the interview earlier today.
the MD was very approachable, as with the rest of the staff.
i went through my portfolio with him, and at the end of it,
he said that he liked my thought process and though i still had a lot to improve upon, he seemed interested in me.
after he left, the CD continued to talk to me.
she said that she'll put me on a 3 days trial next week, and i will be paid at freelance rates. if everything goes well, i should be able to be a permanent staff.
i was extremely happy!
i am one step closer to my goal.

from what i know, design studios don't normally issue trials to potential candidates.
they either hire them, or they don't.
so i'm not sure if it's a good or a bad thing.
but what i do know is that, i've been given another chance to prove myself,
and i pray really hard i'll be able to leave them a good impression next week during my trial.
they are after all a very established company that is expanding and doing really well in the design field.
it would be such an honor to work with them.
and in a Devil-Wears-Prada kinda fashion, if i stick it out with them for the next 2 years, i'll be able to get any design job i want in the future.
simply put, a million designers would kill for this job.
so i pray real hard i don't fuck it up next week...

i have another interview this coming friday.
it's a fashion based design firm, so that'll be really exciting!
so if eff it up on my trial, at least i have a back-up plan to fall on.


::the one and only Bondi Beach. such a pretty sight. took this pic when we just got off the bus::
and yesh! today, the sun was shinning brightly and the weather was absolutely perfect!
26 degrees!!!!
omg, i long for summer badly, so this was a preview of what the weather could be at the end of the year.
to celebrate the fabulous weather and the interview,
lipei and i headed to the one and only Bondi Beach!!!!!!!!!!!
we had so much fun!!!
i think i'll let the pictures do the talking.


::lipei and i enjoying the sun. it felt more like summer rather than spring, which is great!!!::


::erm... me and my new shades::


::i took this picture when a group of guys walked past us. i like this pic a lot::


::lipei and i made a sand turtle. she forced me....::


::just look at what lipei is doing...::


::i played no part in this! it was all lipei's doing! so embarrassing...::


::after spending 3 hours under the sun, we washed up and then had FRIED MARS BAR! yeah you heard it right, fried chocolate mars bar! it's awesomely awesome! i'm still puzzled why lipei doesn't know how to use a fork...::


wana thank everyone again for their kind words.
it made me feel better.
well, that's all for now.
XOXO
D

my first interview

interview with the Creative Director

::feel so defeated...::
so yeah, i had my first interview today.
my first interview EVER.
and well, i believe it's the first of many more to come.
i'm a little disappointed though.
on one hand, i'm glad that they selected me for an interview.
i'm glad that they said they liked my work.
however, on the other hand, i felt i could have done much better for the interview.
argh!
i felt i was caught off guard.
i wasn't nervous to begin with.
i was calm and composed.
i was prepared to answer questions like:
"what are your strengths and weaknesses?"
"what do you NOT like about graphic design?"
"why do you want to work for our studio?"
"give me an example of a problem and how you resolved it."
"what do you do when you have a problem with a team member?"
"what improvements have you made to a particular project?"
but ultimately, she was very casual, and just asked me to show my portfolio and explain my work. it's supposed to be the easiest interview ever! but i feel i sort of messed it up somehow.
argh!
i was tongue tied... my words didn't flow as it should...
i couldn't explained in detail, and kept repeating myself...
argh!
what made me upset is that i'm good at this!
i'm good at explaining my work.
i'm good at presenting!
it's one of my forté, for crying out loud!
arghh!
but i couldnt deliver...
and i'm disappointed with myself...
the creative director did say she liked my work.
but there's more to it than that.
chemistry is really important, and i felt i didn't make enough of an impression.
argh...

i even wore my suit and new Calvin Klein shoes...
i guess the almighty power of fabric couldn't save me either.

i was told not too worry so much.
after all, i do know it's only my first interview.
and normal human beings don't usually get it on their first try..
but i really love the design studio.
they are such an awesome bunch of people.
the studio is too pretty to work in! (i'll be distracted by the furniture and that's a good thing!)
and they are such a well established company with many important clients under their belt.
it would be such an honor to work with them...
argh!

i'm still sending out my resume and portfolio to other potential employers.
a couple of them are fashion based, which is pretty awesome.
i'll try to be as optimistic as i can.
just keep hoping,
just keep pushing myself,
and see where that takes me.

keeping my fingers crossed and twisted.

wana thank those who have wished me luck prior to the interview.
and of cos, the comforting after that. :)

to my precious Zoe

Happy Birthday Zoe!

::not her most recent picture. zoe's just so cute!!!::
i have never liked kids.
i find them noisy, annoying and extremely needy.
and well... kids don't seem to like me very much either.
there's just no chemistry between us whatsoever.
i guess... the feeling's mutual.

but i love my niece, Zoe, very very much.
and for the first time, i can finally understand why couples would want a child(children) of their own.
Zoe is probably the closest i'll ever have to having my own child.
i think about her all the time.
i think about whether if she's walking now, whether if she's speaking now, whether if her teeth have started growing out and so on.
sometimes when i'm out shopping, i find myself unconsciously wandering and pacing around the kids department, browsing through all the adorable outfits for her and wondering which one would go well for what occasion.

i have a picture of her clearly displayed on my table.
looking at it everyday makes me wana hold her tight and kiss her on the cheeks.
it constantly reminds me of her infectious laughter, which never fails to lift up my spirit. or her big bright smile that says everything is gona be alright.
my brother recently sent me an updated picture of her.
she's grown so much in just 2 months...
i cant believe she has started calling my bro and charlotte "papa" and "mama"!
she's still as adorable as ever and smiling as always.

it kills me that i cant be there on her 1st birthday party.
i really wish i could jump on a plane right this minute and see her.
i just pray that i'll not miss anymore of such occasions.
because i want to be an uncle who will be there for her.




::i drew her a birthday card. this illustration was the outer cover that wraps the birthday card. i spent the whole morning drawing 12 different kinds of cupcakes to make this wallpaper. thank God i love cupcakes, or i'll go crazy drawing each one of them::

anyway,

Happy 1st Birthday my precious Zoe!!!!!!
have a fantastic and joyous birthday!!!!
uncle dylan will be back as soon as i can to see ya.

*Zoe turns 1 on the 7th of September. Celebrations would be held on the 6th.*


i cant really upload the picture of the main card becos i drew a character from my "upcoming" children's book, and didnt wana have any copyright issues. i might be able to post it in the future. for now i've just shown it to fauz, lipei, ben and of cos my brother. they love it to bits. so that's good enough. :)